The First DM: How to Move from Public Engagement to a Private Conversation

The Awkward Silence After Connecting

Someone accepted your connection request—fantastic! But a moment of panic quickly follows. An awkward silence hangs in the air. You know you should say something, but what? You don't want to immediately sound like you’re launching into a sales pitch.

This hesitation can kill the momentum you've worked to build. If you wait too long to reach out, the context for your connection gets lost. But if you jump in with a pitch, you confirm their worst fears about connecting with new people and instantly break the trust you've carefully built.

The Simple, No-Pitch First Message

Here’s the secret: the first DM is not a pitch. It’s not even a question. It’s a simple "thank you" that serves as a bridge to a future conversation. The only goal is to acknowledge the new connection and open a friendly, private channel.

Here’s a simple script you can adapt:

"Hey [Name], thanks for connecting. I really appreciated your recent post on [Topic], looking forward to following your work more closely."

That's it. It's polite, it's genuine, and it requires nothing from them. You’re simply closing the loop on the connection request and reinforcing your genuine interest in their work.

Opening a Conversation, Not a Sales Pitch

This simple message completely changes the dynamic. The pressure is off. You've now established a friendly, one-on-one conversation thread that you can return to later. You can let the relationship breathe, continue to engage with their content, and wait for a natural opportunity to re-engage in the DMs.

Mastering this gentle step is crucial before you ever think about turning a warm connection into a discovery call.

Your Task: Send One Thank You Note

The power of this first DM comes from the groundwork you've already laid—it only feels natural because you've already been warming them up. Sending this message is a key milestone in a broader, more intentional strategy like the 16-day prospect warming plan.

Ready to make your next move?

Look at the last three connection requests that were accepted. Pick one. Send them a simple, no-pressure "thanks for connecting" message based on the script above. Your only goal is to open a friendly line of communication.